The Tug of Uncertainty
There’s something about the unknown that makes us feel uneasy. It doesn’t always have to be a big disaster; often, it’s just the gentle, nagging feeling of not knowing what lies ahead. It might be a job interview that comes and goes, or the silence after test results. Sometimes, it’s that subtle sense that things are shifting in your life, and no clear plan is visible.
When faced with uncertainty, we tend to cling to what we can control. We organize our schedules carefully. We create lists, backup plans, and rehearse conversations in our minds before they happen.
While being prepared isn’t wrong, it’s a fragile approach to establishing peace.
What I’ve Had to Let Go Of
I’ve endured this tension for years. As someone who’s walked through a traumatic illness, survived a double lung transplant, and is now awaiting a second one, I’ve had to let go of more control than I ever wanted. Still, God keeps whispering, “You don’t have to know. You just have to trust Me.”
It’s not that I’ve come to love the unknown—quite the opposite. However, I’ve learned to stop letting it have the last say.
One thing I hold onto deeply is the fact that God goes before me. This isn’t just poetic fluff — it’s scripture.
“The Lord himself goes before you and will be with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged.”
— Deuteronomy 31:8 (NIV)
He’s Already There
There’s power in the word “before.” God doesn’t trail behind, hoping to catch up when life throws us a curveball. He isn’t reacting to our circumstances; He’s already in them—already working, already preparing.
That’s what gives me peace, even now, as I wait for donor lungs. God already knows the lungs that will be mine. He knows the timing, the location, and the exact moment when the call will come. No staff member, no system, no delay can change the plan He’s already written.
I can release my grip on the details. Not because I’ve become more relaxed (far from it), but because I’ve learned to trust that what is unknown to me is fully known by God, and He is present in the details.
Fear Isn’t the Enemy—Forgetfulness Is
Trusting God doesn’t eliminate fear; it means fear no longer has control over you.
You might still feel your stomach turn at the thought of what’s coming. You might still have nights where anxiety wins for a moment. But the question isn’t, “Do I feel afraid?” The question is, “Who am I trusting more—my fear, or my Father?”
God doesn’t expect us to predict the future. He simply asks us to trust that He’s already in it.
Your Unknown Doesn’t Scare God
Most likely, your unknown looks different than mine. Maybe it’s a strained relationship that seems to be slipping away, or a season of waiting where nothing seems to be moving. Perhaps it’s something you can’t even name; you just know you’re not where you thought you’d be, and it feels unsettling.
Friend, here’s what I want you to know:
You don’t have to figure everything out.
You don’t have to carry it all.
You don’t have to fix what you were never meant to control.
You just need to trust the One who’s already there.
You Can Breathe Again
Take a deep breath. Your situation might not suddenly get better, but you’re not walking this path alone.
God’s presence is your steady ground—not your plans, not your performance, and not your ability to have perfect faith. Only Him.
And that, in the most uncertain seasons, is more than enough.
Lana, that was so good. The Lord absolutely spoke through you!! —“But the question isn’t, ‘Do I feel afraid?’ The question is, ‘Who am I trusting more—my fear, or my Father?’” — Amen! That was a beautiful perspective and word from God on fear.
Thank you so much! That means a lot to me. I had to sit with that question myself for a while before writing. God has a way of gently pressing on the places we need to surrender, doesn’t He? Fear doesn’t get the final say when our trust is in Him. I’m so glad it spoke to you.
I really enjoyed and reflected on this above blog you’ve written. I’m so very sorry you have to endure a 2nd transplant. I just celebrated my 4 year Lung Anniversary on July 9th. It has been quite a journey but I honestly wouldn’t have done it any differently. I’m truly blessed and forever grateful to my Donor and her family! God has been so good to me in allowing me to celebrate so many special occasions and moments these last years! I admire your courage and strength as I’ve read your book and your story is quite inspiring. You have gone through more than many of us with your Lung disease and treatments!
Wishing you the very best outcome on your next surgery! You are a warrior and I believe will do well!
Prayers and hugs your way! 🙏🙏
Happy belated Lungaversary, Deborah! Four years is such a gift. What a miracle to celebrate! I’m so thankful you’ve had those beautiful moments with your loved ones. Transplant really does give us a front-row seat to God’s goodness, even in the hard times.
Thank you for your kind words, prayers, and support. It means so much to me. I can tell you carry your own strength and gratitude well, and that’s no small thing in this life we didn’t choose but are still so blessed to live. Keep sharing your story—you never know who needs the hope you carry.
Thank you, Lana for your words of encouragement! My favorite quote – “Trusting God doesn’t eliminate fear; it means fear no longer has control over you.” And my favorite challenge that you gave – “Who am I trusting more—my fear, or my Father?” I love how the Lord draws near to us, even in times of fear of the unknown….because He is the God who knows all!
I love how you put that—He is the God who knows all. Amen to that! I’m so glad those words spoke to you. That question, “Who am I trusting more?” has stopped me in my tracks more than once. Fear may show up, but it doesn’t get to lead. So grateful we serve a God who draws near, even when everything around us feels uncertain. Thanks for reading and for sharing what stood out!
Lana, I felt as if you were speaking these words directly to me and my family as we are going through a very difficult medical situation. God has continued to use you to help others who are going through troubling times. Thank you for the reminder that God knows every path we will take and promises to never “leave us or forsake us”. The fact that He goes before us and stays with us is a wonderful example of the love that God has for us. May God continue to use your story for His glory. We love you and are praying for you.
Tammy, your words mean so much to me. I’ve been praying for your entire family, asking the Lord for healing, comfort, and peace that only He can provide. I’m so sorry you’re going through this. It’s in moments like these that His promise to never leave us feels especially close and personal. I’m grateful He used these words to meet you right where you are. Love you all so much, and I’ll keep praying.
Thank you Lana!